Overwhelmed

overwhelmed     Hubs decided on this little time away last week… we love the ocean and with him starting a new position on this next hitch, it was time to clear the mind, re-group, re-focus.  When he first brought it up, I was excited ~ another few days at the beach!  Yay us!

Then I started to put the “list” together, everything that had be done to leave, everything that needed to be bought.  As I was working on the list, it seemed that it was going to be more effort than it was worth.  More chores for me to do.  More things added to an already over-flowing list of things to do.

I was getting frustrated, knowing that Hubs had three days at home before another hitch was upon us.  Yet, he wanted to leave for two and half days at the coast.  That meant doing all his work laundry (not just one wash through but two) and repacking his bag, going with him to take care of some business, picking up his computer from being repaired, going with him for a haircut, going to the grocery store for the supplies for the trip, packing for the trip, making sure Kiddo had everything he needed for his graduation on Thursday, helping Kiddo figure out a bus schedule and how to use it for his rehearsal (Kiddo has never ridden a bus before).

Things were going well, I got up extra early… started the nasty laundry, did my Quiet Time, we were done with running some errands by 11:00 am.  Time to do some more laundry.  Oops, Hubs needs some things he forgot about… off we go.  Come home, time to do more laundry.  Oops, Kiddo needs pants for the graduation ceremony.  Come home, more laundry.  Now it’s getting late, still haven’t packed, still haven’t been to the grocery store, I still have dinner to make, I still have to finish some things for the Gift of the Home.

Can you say mini-meltdown?  The lack of sleep the past few weeks has caught up with me.  I don’t want to go to the coast, I don’t want to do any of this anymore.  I just want to be left alone!

I’m proud to say, even though those thoughts were running through my head, and I was shaking from pure… (what word would you use?);  That I stepped away…I stepped outside and prayed.  I allowed the feelings to flow, I allowed the thoughts to run.

After a while they stopped, everything became still.  In the stillness, this is what came….you take everything on and think that it is up to you to do it all alone.  There are only so many things that you can do in one day.  Yep, that’s me alright…Ms. Do It Myself.

I took a deep breath, went back into the house and called Hubs and Kiddo.  I explained that I was feeling overwhelmed with everything that still had to be done, it was getting late, I was exhausted, and that I couldn’t do this alone.  They looked at me with utter confusion on their face.  Hubs says, “Babe, I thought you had everything under control, what do you need me to do?”  Suddenly, I felt lighter, with more energy.  I delegated what needed to be done and things started running smoothly once again.

Hubs started  getting things ready to load into the car for the trip, repacking his bag and said we would grocery shop when we got there in the morning.  Kiddo cooked dinner and said he would get his own bus schedule and learn on his own.  I completed the laundry, the packing and working on the Gift of Home posts.

I forget, we are a family.  I forget, it isn’t all my responsibility to do take care of everything.  I forget, it isn’t all my responsibility to make sure everyone around me is happy.

Father, May I not forget when I feel overwhelmed that You are with me.  That if I just still my mind and take a deep breath You will open my mind, heart and soul to the correct answers.  May I not forget just how simple life can be.  In Jesus’ name I pray.  Amen.

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